The first time I heard that a Noah movie was being made, I could have honestly cared less. I grew up Catholic and the story of Noah, while impactful, really didn't seem all that exciting to me as a movie. Regardless, building a boat for an hour and a half, shoving two of every animal on it and then surviving the biggest rainstorm in history should be pretty cut and dry for a movie studio, right?
Enter director Darren Aronofsky, director of such trip fest movies as Pi, The Fountain, Black Swan and Requiem for a Dream. He took the Biblical story of Noah and turned it into something actually kinda fun to watch. I saw it with a friend and found myself turning to him multiple times and saying, "What the hell?" ... but in a good way. The basic Biblical story of Noah is there; a man who is charged by God to build a boat big enough for his family and two of every animal to survive the great flood meant to wipe the current evil off the face of the Earth. That is pretty much all about Aronofsky's Noah that is Biblical. Everything else in the movie is from the mind of a very creative, yet extremely weird director.
Now, I'm not
going to go into this review and tell you whether or not I believe that
the story of Noah really happened, or sit here and Bible-thump at you.
I'm a movie critic, reviewing a movie based solely on its own merits and
downfalls, but at the end I'll tell you how it succeeds or fails as a both a "Bible" movie and as a "Fantasy" one.
**MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD**
Noah starts off quickly telling us the story of the Garden of Eden and how Adam and Eve had three sons; Cain, Abel and Seth. Cain of course, killed Abel, and the world became populated with his descendents. Seth's descendents are very small in number and by the time Noah (Russell Crowe) is a child, he is the last one. Noah's father is killed by the king of men, because the descendents of Seth are blamed for their horrible lot in life; that The Creator (The word "God" is never said in the whole movie) has forsaken them. Mankind has turned the Earth, "Paradise," into a post-apocalyptic wasteland and its natural resources are all but gone.
Adult Noah (with a wife and three sons) has a dream about the world meeting its end by water. He believes it's a sign by The Creator that he is supposed to do something about it. He packs up his family and travels to a mountain where his grandfather, Methuselah, lives so he can get guidance. On the way, they adopt a young girl, a survivor of a marauder attack that left her with an abdomen wound, which leaves her adult version (Emma Watson) barren. While she is healing, they are chased into an even more desolate wasteland that no one dares to enter. It's there that they encounter "The Watchers."
In early Noah history, a few angels "fell" to Earth to try and help Cain's descendents, but The Creator was angered and stranded them there. Their fiery bodies mixed with the mud and clay... so they look like rock giants. You remember the rock giants in the story of Noah, right?
The Watchers take Noah and his family prisoner, despite his telling them that he is doing The Creator's work. In the night, one Watcher spirits Noah and his family away, because he was convinced that Noah is telling them the truth, then escorts them to the mountain. There, Methuselah (Anthony Hopkins), gives Noah the last seed from Eden. Noah returns to the bottom of the mountain and plants the seed.
The next morning, Noah awakens to find the other Watchers beating up the one who helped him. Noah gets between them and tells them that this is their chance to do the Creator's work again... to be redeemed by helping him build the Ark. The leader is unconvinced until the seed from Eden erupts, creating a brand new garden/forest. The leader relents and proclaims they will help him.
The movie then fast forwards to ten or so years later. The rest of Noah concentrates on the construction of the Ark, the King showing back up with all the descendents of Cain to take it, the battle before the flood, the flood itself, and a period of time after the waters recede.
The acting was great. Maximus Decimus Meridius... I mean, Russell Crowe is amazing in almost anything he does, and Noah was no exception. Mr. "Are you not entertained?" pretty much channeled Gladiator for the defense of the Ark... and it was fun. Jennifer Connelly is all class, and showed great range of emotion as Noah's wife. Emma Watson is a great actress who has come a long was since her Harry Potter days. I was pleasantly surprised when Logan Lerman showed up as Noah's middle son. I'm glad he keeps getting work and he did surprisingly well as the troubled son, who doesn't have a wife, yet is desperately seeking one before time runs out. Ray Winstone played a great antagonist, though a bit over the top at times.
What did I like? Honestly, if you can put aside what you "know" about the story of Noah, this was a really well made fantasy story. It has magic, fantastic creatures, epic battles, love, loss and drama. I love how they were showing animals, resources and natural elements before the flood that ceased to exist afterward. Picture nine or so rock giants linked together with chain nets defending the Ark against a legion of attacking descendents of Cain in a Lord of the Rings style battle... (Yeah... not in the Bible, but it was awesome.) The CGI and costume design was also well done.
What didn't I like? Even though the CGI was decent, the rock giants did look a little silly at times. The thing that happened to the woman that Ham (Logan Lerman) found to take with him on the Ark. The stowaway. The fact that after the Ark was on the water, Noah turned into a psychopath... I got a strong "Michael Myers" vibe from him for the first 30 minutes of the last 45 of the movie.
I've heard this movie described as "The Story of Noah as written by an atheist." I disagree with that. There were many spiritual and "faith in a creator" themes present in the movie. These are "Bible" movie themes that, while not foreign to atheists, usually are not written by them... at all. Nevertheless, as a "Bible" movie, Noah fails pretty hard on accuracy, so I can see why some of the more outspoken Christian groups are up in arms over this... and they honestly need to calm down. It really is just a movie. As a fantasy movie, I think it truly accomplishes what it set out to do and could stand up next to the other popular fantasy movies that have come out recently. All in all, I definitely enjoyed seeing it.
Final Grade - 7/10
Noah is in theaters now
Until next time... are you not entertained?
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